A Comparison of the Online Lives of the World’s Top-Paid Athletes

What is PeekScore?: PeekScore is a rank from 1 to 10, assigned to every person. The higher someone’s score, the “more important” they are on the web. In calculating your PeekScore and updating it often, PeekYou takes into account your known presence and activity on the Internet, including but not limited to; your blogging, participation in social networks, the number of your friends, followers, or readers, the amount of web content you create, and your prominence in the news.

This concept today could not be simpler: Below is a list of last year’s ten highest paid athletes in the world. In keeping with the kinds of things we get up to here at the PeekScore blog, we’ve decided to see to what degree their compensation corresponds to their visibility, activity, and presence here in cyberspace. We already know that in the case of some of the individuals listed below, a great many don’t believe their athletic abilities alone have gone very far in justifying their arguably obscene, and objectively handsome, paydays. But what of these athletes’ efforts and abilities to reach their spotty, slouchy lessers out here in the ever-expanding, in both size and import, online realm? The PeekScores provide their answers, scientifically and objectively as always.

Who do you like on this list? Who would you have preferred to see on this list? Who do you believe should be the top earning athletes? Do you hate A-Rod? Comment and let us know. (AND PLEASE KEEP SCROLLING ONCE YOU READ THE LIST, FOR FURTHER COMMENTARY.)

Rank Picture Name Earnings from May ’10 – May ’11 PeekScore

Cristiano Ronaldo
$38 million
10 / 10

LeBron James
$48 million
9.66 / 10

Tiger Woods
$75 million
9.56 / 10

Lionel Messi
$32.3 million
9.05 / 10

David Beckham
$40 million
9.01/ 10

Roger Federer
$47 million
8.95 / 10

Kobe Bryant
$53 million
8.76 / 10

Michael Schumacher
$34 million
8.05 / 10

Alex Rodriguez
$35 million
8.04 / 10

Phil Mickelson
$46.5 million
7.74 / 10


This list is not meant so much as a companion to the top earning models list, as it is merely coincidentally a different group of mostly genetically blessed individuals whose efforts, time, and mere presence are extremely well remunerated. It is for the good of mankind that we not associate the lists with one another even in casual conversation, nor even in an informal, relatively frivolous blogging context. Regardless of all the well-meaning talk of the meek one day inheriting our burdened little globe, the fact is that proclamation was initially made two-thousand years ago, and last we checked the meek – some of whom are employed here – were still left empty-handed. If anyone’s to be remaining standing tall when it all goes down, let’s face it; it’s going to be the prettiest, the fastest, and the richest. If they pull themselves away from their mirrors, baby oil, and piles of money long enough to recognize this fact, our inevitable demise will only be hastened.

The men on this list and the women on the world’s best paid models list would find themselves with a horrific combination of fitness, attractiveness, fortune, and global influence (as measured by their PeekScores) at their disposal were the individuals represented on each ever to get together and resolve to pool their considerable gifts. It is attributable either to their mercy or their frankly apparent stupidity, that they’ve not yet harnessed the ungodly power of their combined resources and done away with the nuisance which is we “meek,” and set about repopulating this sphere with the race of grossly overpaid juiceheads and bulimics agile, able, and visually appealing homo superiors their unions would certainly spawn.

Giselle Bündchen, who topped our models list – both in earnings and online influence – is romantically attached to the 13th best paid athlete on the planet. We people are grateful, as his relatively laughable $31 million year has kept him out of the top ten, and kept us safely out of harm’s way. Even if he’d earned enough to warrant inclusion on the list, his adequate, but unimpressive PeekScore would have found him at a meager 8th place. Their spawn is strong, but not yet strong enough to take down the combined meek, as we remain for the moment legion, and many of us still have higher PeekScores than Mr. Brady.

As we here at the PeekScore blog are largely Americans (although it must be stressed this is not true for the greater PeekYou, as a whole), and have therefore not cared about soccer since America’s brief, faddish fixation with it in the 1970s (and also a fleeting period of fascination every four years until the U.S. is inevitably knocked out of the World Cup), we don’t know as much about the gentleman topping our list as we should. But, Cristiano Ronaldo surely has earned our respect and admiration today, and we remain grateful that he and Giselle have either not comprehended – or perhaps did understand, but humanely considered – the consequences of their potential union, and granted us just this short time more to be the meek we are, and (meekly) admire their wealth, beauty, and online prowess, and their agents’ abilities to negotiate for them outlandish contracts.

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